Government doing everything to ensure a Nigerian Pope emerges says Okupe

13 Mar 2013

Government doing everything to ensure a Nigerian Pope emerges says Okupe

Photo by Zoutedrop


 


Abuja - As black smoke rises over the Vatican, signaling that Cardinals are yet to agree on the oldest, frailest candidate, Nigerian presidential spokesman, Danny Okupe, has announced that President Goodluck Ebele Jonathan is doing everything within his power to see a Nigerian Pope emerge.

Danny, while speaking to journalists, noted that President Goodluck's regime has been one of many firsts for Nigeria. He said that opportunity to have a Nigerian Pope would be in keeping with the administration's excellent list of achievements, and must not be missed.

He also announced that the President has set up a panel and sent a high-powered delegation to Rome, charged with the singular duty of doing everything doable to bring the Papacy to Nigeria.

Okupe also noted that, as Nigeria's younger sibling, Ghana, is also in the running to produce the first black Pope, the task of ensuring that Nigeria wins has become even more urgent.

He however rubbished sentiments that attempting to influence the outcome of the Pope Selection process is immoral, if not illegal or even impossible. He said "Are Catholics allover the world not praying that their son be chosen to be the next Pope? What is that, if not attempting to influence the outcome of the conclave? Are Nigerians not praying too? Should the government not do everything to make the people happy?

He went on to berate and call to order, those he described as serial and habitual condemners of government. He said "We know these people. They are the same ones who asked why the president didn’t visit some states because of terrorist attack, and when he went to Borno, they are the same ones saying why he went.

"If my President big brother doesn't do anything to bring the papacy to Nigeria, they are the same people who will be asking why he didn’t do anything."

A budget of $60 million has been approved and released to the Presidential Pope Committee, PPC, and a brand new presidential jet has been acquired to aid committee members in flying between Rome, Paris, London, and Abuja.

- Jowo Mabinu




Comments have been disabled

Comments may be removed if found to be gratuitously offensive,
bigoted, off-point, or simply not cool.
All fields are required. Only click the POST button once.
Thank you for your comments and for keeping it clean.
Name: 

Comment: 


 

Caution: This is NOT real! It's all BS made up to entertain you.
For REAL news, please go to
saharareporters.com




Emotan 77
Former publisher of the women's bi-monthly, Emotan (1977-1984) and op-ed ... now publishes her writing here

Bridging Loans. Get a decision today
We have access to unlimited funding, assuring competitive levels of capital per deal.

Abuja food delivery, call +234 803 369 4078, +234 809 833 944
Afang, edikan ikon, egusi, oha, okro, white soup, jollof rice, yam porriage, moin-moin, white rice & stew ...

Home interiors inspired by Heritage African fabrics
Handmade cushions, bedding, apparel and more

Hand crafted cards by Christiangraffiti
Inspirational notecards and greetings that touch the spirit and pierce the soul