Lagos– It is a well known fact that the biggest, most unforgivable, evil sin a beautiful young woman can commit is to become a lesbian, why then are hordes of young, beautiful Nigerian women turning gay?
This burning question is the subject of a recent, senate-approved investigation.
Lawmakers, worried over the sudden rise in reported cases of lesbianism amongst beautiful Nigerian young women, moved a motion to setup a committee to look into the matter urgently.
The motion was unanimously supported by concerned male members of both Houses, and a high-powered committee of experts was setup to investigate the terrible trend.
A copy of the committee’s report has been obtained and it reveals that the members have now uncovered the reason for the virulent spread of homosexuality amongst beautiful women in Nigeria.
According to the report, during investigations it was discovered that the one thing subjects of the study had in common was Brazilian weave.
The correlation between attaching Brazilian hair to one’s head, and lesbianism, wasn’t immediately clear, so a team was sent to Brazil on a fact-finding mission.
The trip toBrazilled to a shocking revelation. It was discovered that not only Brazilian women, but also Brazilian men, were growing their hair long so as to sell to Hair Merchants who would subsequently package them as Virgin Brazilian Hair, etc, and ship them to customers inAfrica.
It became apparent that, by unknowing fixing MALE hair to their heads, many young, beautiful women were unconsciously becoming more masculine. The hair, being affixed to their scalps, was affecting their brains and causing them to think and act like men (i.e: desire and chase women).
Armed with this information, the committee is now considering creating new laws for human hair extensions. Particularly, like NAFDAC numbers, human hair meant for sale must now carry special registration numbers that will let the consumer know that the hair has been tested and determined not to be male, or from a lesbian woman.
Coincidentally, the investigation also discovered the reason for homosexuality amongst Nigerian men. Apparently, when men have intercourse with women who have fixed MALE Brazilian hair, they are in effect also sleeping with the male grower of the Brazilian hair. This, according to the report, explains the increase in the number of gay men in Nigeria. But since homosexuality amongst men is more of a nuisance than the crime of beautiful, young girls becoming gay, no committee has been setup to look into male gayness.
- Joe Aibozaw