Nigeria offers to bail out the Euro

Abuja - The President of Nigeria, Jonathan Ebele Goodluck, has through his chief publicist announced his administration's plan to bail out the floundering Euro.

According the outspoken PA, the President's decision was based on a need to reposition Nigeria not just as the giant of Africa, but as the Giant of Africa, Europe, Greece and Italy.

The eloquent orator also explained that Nigeria can afford the money to bail out the Euro as it will come out of re-introduced Toll-Gates, savings from oil-subsidy removal, and application fees for new driver's licenses.

Also, and perhaps in anticipation of the cabals and other unpatriotic elements working to bring down the administration of GEJ, the aid assured Nigerians that the bail out of the European Union is well within the President's transformation agenda as it would impact the lives of Nigerians who own properties abroad.

He concluded by explaining that this, like all other ingenious policies adopted by Mr. President, was not the President's idea.

A total of $500 Billion has been approved for the bailout package.

- Joe Aibozaw