Nigerian government begs Jeremy Clarkson not to insult Boko Haram
04 Jan 2012
What a smile. Photo: Wikepedia
London - For once the Nigerian government is acting proactively to avert disaster.
Demonstrating an unprecedented and uncharacteristic level of forward thinking, the government has sent a high-powered delegation to Number 10 Downing Street to kindly but firmly ask the British government and the BBC to do everything in their powers to make sure that Jeremy Clarkson dose not say anything to provoke the Nigerian terrorist group, Boko Haram.
Jeremy Clarkson, loudmouth host of a BBC series, Top Gear, is well known in Britain for his bad dressing, his love of driving, and his exceptional ability to say the most offensive things on television.
Recently he called for striking UK workers to be shot dead, echoing the thoughts of many Britons but at the same time invoking their anger by being able to say what they cannot say.
He followed this up by insulting everything about India and Indians.
Security consultants employed to advise the Nigerian government on how to avoid terrorist attacks analyzed the show, Top Gear, and concluded that after insulting India in the latest episode of his show, Mr. Clarkson would now be looking for something bigger to do. They concluded that it is safe to assume that Nigeria would be his next target.
On the list of no-go areas submitted by the envoy are the Nigerian first-lady, Cassava Bread, and of course, the dreaded Nigerian bomb throwers, Boko Haram.
- Alias X