Shoo! They don dey use winchy! [Photo credit: saharareporters.com]
Abuja – Unconfirmed news just coming in has just revealed the real reason for the postponement of today’s planned parliamentary elections.
According to our source of questionable credibility, Professor Jega, in his rigid determination to run a rigging free election, had to cancel today’s exercise due to the detection of ‘supernatural activities.’
It would be recalled that Wazobiareport.com previously broke the news that Professor Jega had resolved to detain spiritualists ahead of the 2011 elections.
It was reported that his reason for doing this was to make sure that no candidate gained unfair advantage through spiritual means as this constituted cheating.
According to our source, the roundup operation to arrest and detain all known spiritualist was thought to have been successful, particularly when Former Governor Ibori’s in house witchdoctor was captured.
However, as preparations were on the way to begin today’s election, news came from Dubai that Ibori had been released. Everyone knew that this could only mean one thing: the rouge ex-governor still had a powerful magician working for him.
INEC’s own spiritual advisers were immediately put to task to determine whether or not unseen hands were at work as concerns today’s elections.
The official spiritualists are said to have detected strong paranormal activities concentrated around polling areas and as such, the good Professor had to cancel the polls so as to ensure a free and fair election.
Said our source: “Don’t tell anyone that I told you this, but we suspect that juju is already being used by some candidates.
“The first thing we noticed that made us suspicious was when another party called AC, who also have the broom symbol like ACN, suddenly appeared on ballot papers.
"Then when we heard that they have released Ibori, we knew that there were still some powerful magicians in Nigeria.
“It is not our fault at all that we had to postpone the elections. And that story we released, that it is because of inadequate election materials, it is just an excuse.
“ We did not fail to plan for enough materials; only incompetent people will make such a mistake after spending N96 billion.”
- Jowo Mabinu, reporting for wazobiareport.com